Sunday, March 6, 2011

Executing Order 66: Even Jedis Die Sometimes

Its also the kind of weather that nurtures the arch-enemy of any healthy pursuit. Chest congestion, aches and pains. All of the symptoms on the side of the bottle of Nyquil. It was bad for three straight weeks, and those were the weeks after the snow cleared.
Pure and simple, February was a loss. Its like the sudden and tragic death of Jedi Master Qui-Gon Jinn in Episode 1... Bad on top of bad.

Lets discuss. For those of you who don't like in the Midwest, there is many times a thing call "Snow" during the "Ber" and "Ary" months. Chicago was hit with the most epic blizzard since the turn of the century on February 1; the wind was rushing so hard that we couldn't cross intersections without things trying to blow away; the snow slung in your face with a sting so fierce that you could have sworn it was sand or salt.

In the great play about the City of Broad Shoulders, this is what we call "Setting." It's the kind of weather that will depress and subvert any kind of goal and will turn good men into cold-hearted bastards and vengeful beasts.

This was the first "Bad" in the above equation about our dearly departed Master Jedi. It was a perfect storm of Too Much Effort and Too Little Healthiness. But, in the grand scheme of things, these defeats can really only account for the final twist of the Lightsaber to my month long endeavor to try and lose weight. PS, I still don't know why Qui-Gon didn't turn into a Force Ghost.

The greatest battle, however, was really the pod race in the pizza.

I counted. I really did. We got call in Pizza five times. Five. Really. I ate Chipotle another six times. Summing it all up, that's about 6000 calories over the month in burrito deliciousness. We called in Ribs and Chinese and Vietnamese. We were really, really horrible about eating right, about buying fresh food, and about planning out our meals so that we could try to have some semblance of healthy meals.

Needless to say, we lost the Battle. I was 3.5 lbs above my weight goal, which, tragically, is actually gaining weight compared to my lowest point in January.

So, starting on Tuesday, I started planning again. Because, just like Patton, you can't beat the enemy unless you read their book:
Old Blood n' Guts Dossier
  • Exercising a minimum of 4 times a week, every week. If I don't, I lose $10 Fat Cash
  • Menu planning for every day of the week, including when we're planning on going out to eat
  • Being mindful of my caloric intake, I have a goal of losing essentially 2 lbs a week,